A weekend away!

It's been a while! Much has happened and I am trying to work out life's best balance!! (Work in progress!)

So in a nutshell... Bubba gump (baby number 3) is due beginning July!! (Hoping end of June! - like I get a say in that right?!?)... Moved into our first stand alone house in our entire marriage... Noosh has given up day sleeps (sigh)... I am back working 2 days a week... Kids started nursery... Noosh started ballet lessons (too cute)... Tad is such a boy - into body slams, emptying cupboards, playing in toilet water, active active active! Christmas came... Christmas went... How's that for a paragraph catch up!

So my wonderful parents flew into Cairns last weekend so Hubby and I could take a belated wedding anniversary weekend away. Note: our first time leaving our children with anyone other than us!!!! Our first time away from children in 3 1/2 years!! We went up to Port Douglas for 2 nights... And slept in 2 mornings (my first sleep in beyond 6am in 3 1/2 years!) it was lovely!!!

 

Hubby took me out Saturday night to an amazing restaurant. We ate under the stars and I crossed off an item from my bucket list... I did a 7 course tasting menu!!! AMAZING!!! Sadly my camera battery died after the second course so I didn't manage to get photos but man did I savour the experience!!

 

  

 

We returned to 2 very happy children and 2 very tired grandparents!!

It was lovely, and we missed the kids lots but was so nice to regroup and talk (uninterrupted) and eat when I was hungry and go to the toilet alone!

It really is the small things!

xxx

Moving

So my absence from blogging has not been intentional but rather brought about by our big news!!!!

We are moving!!! ... to Cairns!!!!

So the last 3 weeks have seen Hubby be offered the job, accept the job, moving companies contacted for quotes, scouting trip to Cairns for 5 days completed, my resignation handed in, children's nursery resignation handed in... and now we have farewells, Noosh's 3rd birthday (which we are celebrating early so she can have it with her friends), and last days with the dear people that have made Sydney home for us for the past 20 months.

On our way to Cairns. Noosh being ever so much the grown up girl!!

Its bittersweet.

Hubby's job is an interesting change. On paper it looks like a demotion, but he has wrangled a pay increase into his offer.  His new boss is FANTASTIC! He sees the value in Hubby and sees the potential for where he can end up.  He is a big promoter of family (in fact him and his wife have already offered their babysitting services!).  I'm so proud of my husband... my heart is bursting with pride.

Life style will be awesome too.  We'll be moving from a 2 bedroom apartment (+ study) to a 4 bedroom house with a swimming pool.  We'll get that backyard. And the kids will get a trampoline for Christmas.  And for all this... cheaper than the rent we pay in Sydney!!  It also means we have loads of space for visitors!!! Great barrier reef up this way so plan your visits over the next 12 months!!

Outdoor water play area in Cairns.

I'm sad about leaving the kids nursery though!  They have been nothing short of STUNNING! Wow!  Even now... I get really emotional about how the kids will cope not seeing their favourite carer's on a weekly basis... Sophia, Mimi, Rachel, Natalie, Sue, Mandy, Jenny have just been amazing.  I don't want to say goodbye.  I'm sad for our little people that I'm very happy to relocate myself but what does it mean for them.  I don't want to do resettling into another nursery.  I don't want the torture of hearing their cries for weeks on end as I drop them off...

Who says this is out of order? Especially when Daddy can create the virtual motion anyway!

BUT...

In a twist of events, the job I thought I might have, may not happen.  I was offered a job within 24 hours of emailing my CV.  It turns out that she may not be able to pay me a 'breakeven' salary (as childcare is more expensive up in Cairns than in Sydney - crazy!).  This initially was upsetting but my little people are growing far too quickly and why shouldn't I take a year out to hang exclusively with them.  I can embrace playgroups, mainly music groups, enroll Noosh in ballet lessons (be still my excited heart!!!).  Plus, I have a business idea.  I floated said business idea with one of my Sydney besties (who is a graphic designer) and she said she would do all the design work for advertising for me.  So who knows... I've always had a hankering for working for myself so why not give it a go?  The other option for me is starting my masters!! Decisions decisions!!

Daddy and Noosh exploring the creek in Cairns.

So can you understand my excitement... my reticence... my sadness... my eagerness???  And can you also understand my absence???

Mortality

It's been a crazy fortnight... actually a crazy few months.  There are things that happen that make you aware of your own mortality and make you so appreciate the moments that you have in life.

My peas in a pod!

To this end I'd like to share the journey that has been the past few months for the benefit of the little people that may read this in years to come.  It's sometimes really nice to realise that your own parents have 'issues' of their own and everyone walks their own journey's and that sometimes you don't know what is going on in the lives of those around you.

Check out my flower!

 On Good Friday of this year I found a lump in my breast.  In my family we don't have a history of breast cancer but in this day and age I know that you can't afford to make assumptions... good or bad.

Favourite toy... the container that all toys are in!

Cute lil' man.

So I checked it out... After I had an ultrasound I was advised it was 'probably' just a milk cyst and I should have a further ultrasound in 2 months.  3 weeks ago I had the second ultrasound and found that the 'cyst' was bigger.  I was then referred for a biopsy... you know... with needles.... ick!   I mean I'm not scared of needles or anything... but there are more pleasant things in life that I would love to be doing!

Tea party with dollies... Tad more interested in the ball!

Who knew that rolling a ball would have us all in hysterics!!

In between the second ultrasound and my biopsy (time frame = 2 weeks) I was actually a little anxious... until my mother made me sit down and do what all good educated people should do... not.  (But in this case reassurance was gained!)... we googled!!

Doing some planting of herbs... will they live?? Not sure!!

Hubby preferred not to talk about it and was not going to get preoccupied making 'arrangements' for what 'could be'.  I, on the other hand was planning all the videos and letters that I would write to both Noosh and Tad for all significant events in the future that I may not be there for.... my wee princess's first dance, her first broken heart, her wedding, my wee princes' first car, first date (eek) and his first child.  So many moments of calmness and relishing their presence (crying or not) followed.

So beautiful!

I am still giving Tad a little feed before I go to bed at the moment, and I truly think this is my most favourite time of day.  I scoop his little body (lets be honest, hes' not little... he's ginormous!!) up from his slumber and perch myself on the end of Noosh's bed.  My little man stays asleep and fills his tummy and in the darkness I look at their peace-filled faces.  Sometimes I wonder how I ever managed to live without them... other times I reflect on just how much they have taught me... other times I just think of how unbelievably blessed we are to have such beautiful beautiful beautiful children.  They amaze me... how fantastic that I got chosen to look after these little lives... to encourage them, to be their biggest cheerleader in life, to challenge them and lets be honest... maybe yell a little (only occasionally).  What an enormous responsibility! (See I have a tendency to go quite deep in these wee treasured moments!!)

One of those moments... she wanted to sleep in her old cot... so... she did!

Isn't he handsome?!

Anyway...

In a funny turn of events the radiologist who did my biopsy last week works with me at the hospital I work at so although we had never met we had a lot of information to share about mutual colleagues.  Was a little odd that I was undressed for this conversation but in the world of medicine I know what it's like (and I have had 2 children so I know all about dignity walking out the door!!)

Watching the ipad in my 'special' seat

Wee boy (excuse the feeder) attempting to crawl.

I'll never forget what he said after the anaesthetic was done and he was drawing the fluid out (is this too much information)... he said the magic words...'Well we won't be sending this fluid away for testing as I am 100% certain it is a 'milk cyst' (although he did use the technical terminology for 'milk cyst'.  I have worked in the medical profession for 13 years and I didn't realise that in the background of my optimism and common sense, sat a low grade anxiety.  For just over 2 months, I felt like I was holding my breath, waiting for someone to stop time and give me bad news.  What a blessing! God obviously knew that I have other things to do in my life... I have 2 beautiful, amazing children who bless my life everyday that I am to take care of (and He obviously knew that Hubby couldn't do it on his own - he he).  So there it is... my little miracle... my unbelievable relief speaks for itself.  In saying that, I think its been such a growing experience to go through, making me cherish the little things, the big things and everything in between.  Don't get me wrong there are still moments (like today when Noosh missed the toilet for the second time) that I don't respond very well to, but it's just a moment and the reality is that I am here!

Decorating Daddy's birthday present

My Mother's Day

I haven't told you about my mother's day have I... a month ago now. Scary how time flies.

I was initially saddened by the news that Mother's Day was on the weekend that I had my whirlwind visit to NZ and wouldn't be with my Noosh for most of the day... little did I know that Hubby had plans.  Not over the top plans (like proposing at the top of the Eiffel Tower - he he) but just enough plans to make this Mumma feel loved and cared for by her little poppets.

Not to mention that nursery also came to the party and showered me with gifts from our little people... I could so get used to this!! Noosh  gave me a cup and photo on something that I can't really work out what it's meant to be.... but it's cute!!  Tad gave me a seedling in a planter complete with his thumb print (which had to be done twice as he liked the squishiness of paint), a calender with a sample of his artwork.

My amazing sister-in-law, brother and niece gifted me a card and scrummy scrummy chocolates in the morning.  I love that you remembered and that you just cherished me.  Felt so so spoilt!! (Sorry don't have a photo of the chocolates... they were devoured!!)

I got met at the airport by my little girl running so fast that we were almost bowled over.  She was carrying a card that her and Daddy had made... they had painted and glued and it was just perfect.

I then got home to unwrap the coffee machine that Hubby had purchased. Simple things... things that I had been coveting... things that Hubby knows that I love and when he can he does like me to have some of the pleasures in life.

 So I consider myself the most spoilt Mumma of two most precious, most gorgeous, most talented little people ever!! (Biased... absolutely!!) So a few random shots of the past few weeks so you can get a feel for their cuteness, their antics, and their delightfulness.

Cleaning my ears Mumma.

It's not always smiles at bathtime, but lots fun tonight!

Loving my little brother.

So, I can pedal my own bike now!! Must be a big girl... look out world!

I can't even wait until bedtime... it's exhausting this baby stuff!

Delicious wee man!

LOVING her hair in a ponytail... sadly it doesn't last long before pulled out!

A little bit of sparing post bath... our little 10kg heavyweight might not have the 'skills' but he sure has the mass!!

Uncertain what the 'wipe' is there for...

Being a little creative.

Whirlwind

The last fortnight has been particularly chaotic... in a good way...

We moved house last weekend... whew!! Somehow though, I managed to score big time by being in NZ. Sadly though the boxes didn't unpack themselves and we are still working though a few more before I think we can say 'it is finished'!

Noosh and Tad have been in the thick of it for the last 4 weeks, packing boxes and unpacking boxes. We even arrived home on Monday night to have had our power disconnected. Somehow we managed to give the children something to eat and put them to bed before the power was reconnected at 9pm. (Note: This was the power companies oversight, not us not paying our bill - just wanted to be clear!!)

We are now on the ground floor (woo hoo) and I have a clothesline.  I get so much joy from hanging out my washing now!!  So no more clothes horse (have done this for the last 5 years), and no more 6 flights of stairs with a toddler and baby!! Sigh.

I visited NZ for a mere 36 hours.  I knew it wouldn't be long enough but I love that I got to see some of my most favourite people and reconnect... and know that all is well and that we can pick up where ever and when ever.  The reasons for being in NZ were for a baby shower of one of my besties and to meet my newest niece, born in January!  Tad and I went together and left Hubby with Noosh for the weekend.

I got to meet my gorgeous niece.  Tad was also quite taken with her.  It was such a treat to watch my brother interact with his wee girl and finally spend some time with my sister-in-law which is what I've been longing to do since their engagement - sadly the time was but fleeting!!  They are both besotted with their wee girl and I'm pleased to say that she is so good to them! 

It is definitely an interesting season. Tad has decided over the past 8 weeks that sleeping is over rated and with so much going on with moving and different time zones, injections, colds, ingrown toenails and things, Hubby and I gave in to the multiple appearances overnight.  Suffice to say that over the past 8 weeks I have not slept longer than 2 hours continuously.  Believe me, it is a sorry state of affairs when the idea of a 4 hour sleep is luxury!!

So last night we decided that I could not continue so we are attempting to get our wee (adorable) man to sleep through again using the principles from Save our sleep.  I have never been a fan of controlled crying and the Save our sleep idea is that you never leave your child but stay with them until they sleep by your presence.  Sounds lovely right?!!! Well, I wanted to chuck the book away at 3.45am this morning after said baby started crying at 1.45am!! For 2 hours (not continuously as it was far too cold!!) I stood like a dutiful mother at the side of his cot rubbing his back, patting his bottom. He did not get any milk (probably much to his horror) and I WON!! Sleep reigned at 3.45am!! Tonight has to improve doesn't it???

But both children are sleeping soundly now. They are having to share a room at the moment so it is interesting as Noosh gets transferred to Daddy's bed when Tad wakes and sleeps the remainder of the night there - I get relegated to the single bed next to the cot! (Until Friday night when it is Hubby's turn!!! - 4 hours of continuous sleep here I come!!)  The hilarious thing about this is that Noosh has started to sleep talk... the night before last she proclaimed 'Mummy go wees' and last night it was 'No, I do it... I do it'. Too cute!

Anyway, sorry for the silence of late... it has been far more important to make the house livable and now that the computer is out of sight (in its own room) it is more difficult for me to get to.  I'll endeavour to take a few photos of the house so you can see our surroundings.